About Me

My photo
Nebraska, United States
A would-be stay at home mom working full-time as a teacher. I teach at my old Highschool, working side-by-side with my own teachers. I blog to keep the Texan grandparents updated and chronicle our life for future reference. (In other words, I don't have a real baby-book or diary.) Comments make my day. Thanks for stopping by! kimlepper at gmail.com

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Typical Tuesday

My question today revolves around CIO. For those of you who know what this stands for, chances are you, you have your own opinion about it.

For those of you who don't, allow me to educate you so you too may join in on the fun!

CIO=Cry it out

I use to think that if a baby is crying, it's because they need something. If you let them cry, you are not giving them what they need.

I use to think a fussy baby could be "cured" by swaddling, loud noises, swinging, eliminating certain foods, baby wearing- so many options, in fact, that CIO shouldn't even be considered, right?

I use to think
(judge) other parents who let their baby cry or couldn't get their baby to settle down were obviously not doing it right (no clue what "it" was, just sure they were doing it wrong)

See the subtitle to my blog up at the top there?

That is why I was given Samantha.

Because God thinks He's so darn funny.

What happens when you have a Samantha, who just
doesn't stop?
One that just screams unless she has the boob.
One who, despite being very tired and in a very comfortable car seat on a long, smooth road trip will scream
the entire trip instead of sleeping.
One who wakes up 2-3 times a night screaming bloody murder for 30 seconds, and then goes back to sleep.
One who screams and cries at her toys because...actually, we don't know why. She just looks at it, furious with tears streaming down her face-and we have to take the toy away. And these are not frustrating toys. This is like a marker or a block.

I will admit that up to a certain age (4 months-ish) where if a baby cries, they truly do need something, even if it is simply to be held.
But after 4 months....well, sometimes they just need to blow off some steam.

In our case, our little steam engine needs to go constantly.

So we let her cry. When we have someone come over to babysit while she's sleeping, we tell them
not to go in if she cries. They kind of look at us funny and I find myself explaining how much I hate it and never thought I'd have to do it, but that we just let her cry.

So, if I hate it so much, why do we let her?

Because then she sleeps 12 hrs.
And, recently, naps for
90 minutes.

I have friends whose babies are Samantha's age and the parents
refuse to do CIO.
Or try it for 20 minutes and give up.
And they are exhausted.

Don't get me wrong- Samantha is still exhausting! But a good night's sleep makes a world of a difference for both her and me.

My question to you, is, have you ever/will you ever/do you ever plan on using CIO?

For anyone who has a child like Samantha, how long 'til she will just
go to sleep without fighting it? Or is this a life-time "funny" God has given me?


Kati said...

Bernadette always cried at least a little until she was moved to a toddler bed (15 months or so). Clare was a champ and has been sleeping tearless for a long time. It is so true that the extra sleep is worth it for everyone!

Momma Mere said...

We have done it just for a little bit, mainly when I am home alone in the day. I agree that at least the first 4 months when they cry it's best to show them you are there for their needs. I have been starting now to wait for five minute intervals before going in, then bumping up the time frame each week or two weeks. And yes a not so sleepy mommy makes for a much happier day for both!

Sandra said...

At 4 months I let them cry it out. Here are "my" rules.
1. I know they are not hungry, poopy, too hot or too cold and safe in their crib.
2. I know that they are not cramping (because long before 4 months we have identified and eliminated any food/food groups that are necessary).
3. I know they are not sick.
4. When we decide to let them cry it out, I or Keith go in every 20 minutes and burp them and they always burp! :-) Then we lay them back down and keep doing it until they are asleep.

ALL the boys thus far have been "sleep fighters" at first...don't ask me why as Keith and I love sleep! What we have done has worked, I am thankful we have good sleepers now! :) Oh, and they only cry long the first 2 or 3 nights. By the 4th or 5th they fuss for about 20 minutes max and are asleep. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Now-want to come fold some laundry with me next week? :-)

Anonymous said...

Well... that's interessting but actually i have a hard time visualizing it... wonder what others have to say..

Bryanne Colvin said...

I have to say, Isidora was always a pretty good sleeper. However, I am a firm believer in letting your child cry. We did this with Isidora starting at some point when she was fairly young - it was the point where she stopped falling asleep while nursing and instead just started playing. Then it was bed time.
One difference with us I think is that we really couldn't afford not getting the sleep (med school). However, I truly believe that letting your child cry teaches them to self-soothe, which is a key skill in their development. By letting your child cry, you are teaching them how to let themselves go back to sleep without intervention. A caveat here is that it is important to know if your child is in distress - as in know if their cry is not appropriate, if they are sick or hurting or some such. Isidora's favorite thing to do is to get her leg caught between the bars of her crib, and both Matt and I know that something is wrong when she cries for this reason.
I think too many parents are afraid to let their child cry, but it is okay to do! And it teaches them good habits for the future!

MamaOtwins+1 said...

I let them cry it out- when you have checked to make sure nothing is wrong/needed - let 'em wail!

I may sound harsh, but children have to learn to calm themselves otherwise they will be on your hip 24/7. And I was put in a position that I couldn't soothe every cry. As a parent of multiples, you learn VERY quickly, you can't make everyone happy all the time.

ps. I came over to meet one of my newest followers, and found a subject I am passionate about. ;)

Anonymous said...

Kim, Sam is old enough to let her cry. She is old enough to know that if she cries long enough and hard enough she can get her way. She would much rather be with you and be social than take naps or sleep so she is going to fight it. You have to teach her when it is time to sleep and when it is time to play. Now is the time for her to learn that Mom and Dad make the rules...not the kids. Be strong. I know it is hard. Eventually she will grow out of this! I could never see the light at the end of the tunnel when Cortney was baby. I thought I would be changing diapers and trying to spoon feed runny baby food for the rest of my life! This too shall pass and believe it or not you will barely even remember most of the details!

Anonymous said...

Girl you were around me when Evan was an infant, you saw how exhausted I was. I used to think and judge too. Evan was very similar to Samantha. Especially the toy-induced hysteria. And we did CIO. And we've all been sleeping through the night for a very long time, except of course when we are moving (which is always) or when he's sick (which is very rare thank God). It worked for us. And just like any parenting decision, you have to do what works for YOU and YOUR baby.
:) Miss you girl.

Ram Sam Sam

Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers

Lil Sister

Lilypie Third Birthday tickers


Lilypie First Birthday tickers